Champagne: Persian, 4.5 years old, world traveler, cat model, internet celebrity.
Background: rescue cat born in Thailand and has since moved to the Philippines and Germany. Notorious on airlines and intercity express trains for her (perfect) behaviour and regal presence.
Kessy: Persian, 15 years old, adopted four weeks ago from the animal shelter with severe kidney ailment, given only four weeks to live but has since recovered.
Background: Born and raised in Berlin, prior criminal record not released.
The set-up: home office with printer, side board, plants and carpet.
The plan: there was none.
The result: major.
Is the coast clear?
The dastardly dead:
Chew on innocent plants,
Taste the leaves.
Uproot with no mercy.
Drop on the white carpet.
Cough up hairballs.
The cover-up story:
look as cute as possible and pretend nothing happened. If it did, we had no prior knowledge. It was all part of the Canine Conspiracy.
Kessy: not guilty due to dementia
Champagne: not guilty due to... well, not guilty.